Elevator Speech Tune-up
Tell the truth. Are you sure you capture the attention of listeners who ask the question, “What do you do?” If you feel your words are falling on deaf ears, your elevator speech could need a tune-up.
If you’re having trouble immediately selling people on the benefits you and your business provide, let Spotlight Writing tune up your elevator speech. Email the words you’re using now with any back-up information about your business (online brochure, website).
Within a few days, I’ll email back some suggestions so your introductory words get the attention they deserve.
Here are some examples:
John Vargo - financial expert seeking a position
ORIGINAL
My name is John Vargo and I provide management with accurate and timely information that they can use to make real time decisions. My experience ranges from starting and running a small company to being the financial executive for a branch of a billion dollar national company. I have been providing information, technology and direction to the service and manufacturing industries for over 20 years. I am looking for a controller, accounting manager, financial position.
AFTER TUNE-UP
I’m John Vargo, but you can call me controller…accounting manager…financial advisor…even experienced small business owner. I’m known for providing accurate and timely financial information so business owners or CFOs can make decisions for running their businesses more efficiently…and effectively. Do you know of a business currently looking for someone like me?
Linda Mihalik - Reiki Master
ORIGINAL
By laying my hands gently on your body, or just above it, I can help re-align your body's energy into its natural flow. This promotes healing, eases pain, lessens stress, and creates a sense of clarity and balance. Reiki can be used alongside any other form of treatment and enhances the effectiveness of the treatment. The best part is that it requires little work on your part!
AFTER TUNE-UP
If you haven’t known the comfort that Reiki provides, by itself or in conjunction with other healing methods…, let me introduce you. Using a light touch…or none at all…I’ll restore proper flow to the energy throughout your body. You’ll be healthier with regular Reiki treatments. You’ll see.
Venera Izant - Citizens Bank
ORIGINAL
I am a licensed and experienced banker who has been in business for 29 years. I offer you relationship driven solutions for all your integrated banking needs. I am fluent in all personal, business banking, and financial needs; from wealth management issues to all commercial issues, so that you can have peace of mind. I am very objective, service oriented, and always keep YOUR best interest in mind.
AFTER TUNE-UP
People deserve a banker who is experienced enough to not only understand what it takes to meet their needs and to achieve their dreams-but also knows how to do it. I'm that banker...and Citizens Bank, still financially safe and sound, is my bank. For your private and commercial banking, I promise to always keep your best interests at heart.
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